Is it okay to be angry with God?

[Sharon Billington]

Most of those we see in our Christian Counseling practice have issues with anger, and one of the most frequently asked questions is , "Is it okay to be angry with God?"


Our answer may surprise you. We explain that anger is an emotional response, and it can express surprise at some kind of loss like the loss of a relationship through death, divorce or betrayal, the loss of health due to accident or illnes or the loss of financial security due to circumstances beyond your control or perhaps a mistake you've made.


Most of the time for us believers, anger at God comes from a sense of betrayal, perhaps expecting a promise made in His word not happening in our life or the life of someone we care about. We've said and done all that we understand, and the situation still hasn't changed, and we're hurting because of it. We reason that God is all-powerful and can change things in a second, and that's true, but that's not the whole story. The key here is God's timing for what's best for us when along with living the serenity prayer, which truly helps us to accept the things we cannot change, to do our part if change is possible and asking God to grant us the wisdom to know the difference. The serenity prayer seems to have roots in Matthew 6:33, where Jesus tells us to live God's way of life (something we can choose to do) and that all we need will be given to us (God will provide what we need at the right time for us).


We can all be like Job, who didn't repent in the true sense of the word. He did nothing wrong but was angry at God for not being there with him (or so he thought) during his time of great attack and distress. He was mad at God for allowing terrible things to happen to him when Job could find no reason as to why: there was no cause and effect. In a very real sense, Job felt betrayed by the God who had so greatly blessed him until that time in his life. Nothing Job did or said changed, but his circumstances sure changed for not only the worse, but the terrible!


In each chapter of our emotional recovery workbook for Christians, we have a journaling question that goes like this:

Have you asked God to forgive your anger at Him for allowing you to suffer so much? Do you know He is ready and willing to forgive you? Write about how and why you are angry at God. It's okay, He can take it! Be as specific and detailed as you like. Then, if you are able, as God to forgive every bit of your anger. If you have trouble asking Him this, then ask Him to help you ask Him!


Jesus said He came to set the captives free and to heal the broken-hearted. Forgiveness is one of those tools that can set you free. Forgiveness opens the door to better relationships with God, others and self. Can you forgive yourself for not understanding God, His ways and timing like you thought you did, and can you forgive God for the hard times in your life knowing that they all have a purpose that you may not understand just yet?


For more encouraging words, important information on Christian emotional recovery, and a sample chapter from our life-transforming, widely praised emotional recovery workbook for Christians, visit our site now and often.


Warmly, with all blessings,

Pastor Sharon Billington

author, Encouraging Words for Life's Tough Times, An Emotional Recovery Workbook for Christians

director, Encouraging Words Minstries

http://www.encouragingwordsministries.com

Transforming lives through developing balanced, emotionally healthy relationships with God, others and self

[Nadine]

I do not think it is okay to be angry at God. I have been angry at God before and I felt awful. I couldn't wait to be friends again. It was wrong to accuse God falsely and blame Him when He is always good to me.

Nadine

[Sharon Billington]

That's an interesting response. Truth be told, anger makes anyone feel awful because it causes stress and sends harmful chemicals in our systems. My point is that God wants us to be real with Him. He is my friend, and sometimes I feel like my Friend lets me down, and I get angry just like I do with those human people who are my friends. Just because I may be angry for a while doesn''t mean I am going to stay that way. It gives release and frees me to be and do what He would have me be and do. Have you ever thought of anger as freeing?

Hugs,
Pastor Sharon

[Nadine]

No, anger has never freed me. It has only made me a prisoner. Love and trust and understanding have freed me though. I don't think there is any anger in heaven, but I am certain there is lots of love. I figure I better learn to love here on earth so I fit in to the loving way in heaven. Love and trust and understanding are as real as anger, just like Satan is as real as God. And the choices I have are real and I am trying to choose to love and trust God and NOT jump to conclusions and get mad and be irrational and accuse God anymore. He has feelings and is hurt the same as I am when someone treats me harshly. I don't think He is some kind of heavenly punching bag that I need to take all my negative feelings out on before I can be free.

Nadine.

[Sharon Billington]

Did you know God gets angry? He created us in His image mentally and emotionally, so we can experience all that He is, Yes, He is love, but he is filled with emotions, and so are we. It's all about expressing these emotions in a balanced, healthy way just like He expects us to love Him, others and ourselves in a balanced, emotionally healthy way.

It's a great thing that you consider how God feels. He loves you for that, and so do I. No, He's not a heavenly punching bag, but He does understand when we react in hurt and anger when things happen that hurt, or that we don't expect or seem unfair. Job got angry (truly upset!) with God. He didn't have access to the information we do in the first two chapters of the book, so he was clueless as to what was going on in his life. God was NOT upset at Job for being upset with Him. As a matter of fact, He showed Job just who was behind things in chapter 41.

Choosing love is a great thing. What Christian can have a problem with that? God looks on your attitude and intention (your heart). If you get angry with Him, is it really accusing Him or is it something else entirely, like perhaps expressing your pain over a situation that hurts?

Thanks for sharing your experience and viewpoint here. I can see that you have given a lot of thought to this and that you have found a way to be that works for you.

Hugs,
Pastor Sharon
director, Encouraging Words Ministries
http://www.encouragingwordsministries.com
Transforming lives through developing balnced, emotionally healthy relationships with God, others and self

[Nadine]

Yeah, I know God gets angry. When we are very wrong to each other He gets angry and when we don't trust Him and are really messing our life up He gets angry. But I don't get angry at Him because He is wrong to me, or because He is really messing my life up. I get angry at Him because He isn't doing what I expect or want, or when I am trying to be God and tell Him what to do and He isn't reversing the roles. That is why it is okay for God to be angry at me, but it is not okay for me to be angry at God. When God is angry His anger always has love in it that is centered on my welfare. When I have been angry at God my anger has not been centered on God's welfare. That is the big difference.

I can express pain I feel without being angry. Jesus expressed great pain to His Father without being angry at Him.

Nadine

[Sharon Billington]

I see you really feel strongly about this, so we'll have to agree to disagree and leave it at that. I respect your position and see that it works for you.

Hugs,
Pastor Sharon

[Nadine]

I'm sorry. I thought you were asking me questions to encourage discussion. I wasn't trying to be disagreeable. I was sharing my experience which is already passed so I can't change it even if I wanted to.

Nadine

[Sharon Billington]

Why the apology? You are right. This was intended for discussion. I just couldn't tell which way you were going with this. It seemed to be a matter of conscience with you, and that's something I respect and don't interfere with. Sorry if there's a misunderstanding. So......what else do you want to say?

[Nadine]

Thank you for starting this discussion.

Nadine

[Chris]

I have just reread the book of Job and I don't believe that Job was ever angry with God. When I saw the discussion question I decided that it was one that I would like to join. At first I did not read through the whole post, but decided I would go to the Bible to find examples of people who stood firm for the Lord through adversity and those who did not. I had decided to contrast Job and Jonah but that plan sort of stalled when I read the entire question.
I heard a preacher once note that if the Devil had known what the Lord was going to do with the experience of Job he would have left him alone.

[Sharon Billington]

Hi Chris. Thanks for your response. Well, we're also going to have to agree to disagree because George and I believe that Job was angry with God! He was frustrated because he couldn't find an answer as to what was going on with his life and what caused the sudden change in circumstances. He was literally demanding that God come share with him why he was experiencing these terrible things and losses. It takes a really secure person to be angry or upset with God, one who has a real relationship with Him. Up until then, Job's life was greatly blessed because of his relationship with God. His attitude and heart didn't change but yet his circumstances sure did! He no longer could explain or understand his life, and that understandably upset him, especially due to the lack of support and even the attacks from those who called themselves his friends.

It might help you to understand that we have had to go through hard times not because of anything we did but because of God's plan and purpose for our life just like Job did. God pointed Job out in confidence to the devil, and we believe it was because God knew Job's attitude, his heart so thoroughly that He allowed the devil to prove to himself that even taking away Job's protection and literally everything he had didn't change Job's loyalty or relationship with God.

That's the whole point of the original question, anyway. it's really about the relationship being there regardless of how we feel at that moment in time. Anger, hurt, and disappointment are part of our experience, and God understands that and loves us through it just like He did with Job.

In His amazing love,
Pastors George and Sharon Billington
http://www.encouragingwordsministries.com
Transforming llives through developing balanced, emotionally healthy relationships with God, others and self